Part 3

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Part 3

~Suddenly I see you change...~

"Lance?"

He felt a hand shaking his shoulder. Groaning, he opened his eyes. There to meet him were a pair of bright blue eyes. "Hey Josh," he muttered, stifling a yawn. "What time is it?"

"A little after six. You hungry?"

"Yeah, I guess," Lance said, sitting up. "I guess we should order something, huh?"

"What?" JC looked at him, puzzled.

"Order. You know, food?"

"Why?"

"Cause it's getting late."

"Yeah, but Lance, I cooked."

"You did?" Lance sat up a bit more and sniffed the air. He didn't smell anything. "Josh? Are you kidding me?"

"Why? What do ya mean?"

"I don't smell anything."

"Really?" Josh's puzzled expression turned to one of mild concern.

"Don't give me that look," Lance said, standing up. "It's probably just my sinuses."

"Yeah, I'm sure it is," JC said agreeably. "Come on, let's eat."

***

"So," JC said, rolling toward Lance, who was looking over some paperwork. "You excited?"

"What about?" Lance asked, not looking up.

"The tour."

"Oh, yeah. Absolutely. Tour buses, hotels and airplanes, and getting to spend absolutely no time alone with you, except at night, when we'll be too tired to do much but sleep. Yeah, can't wait."

"Come on Lance. It won't be that bad."

"You think?" He finally looked up and placed his papers aside. "What, am the only one who remembers the last two tours?"

"Lance..."

"I mean, God forbid we look like we're just a little too close. And all the interviews. 'So, Lance are you seeing anyone?' 'Oh no, we don't have time for that. I want to be there for my girlfriend.' God, I'm so sick of it!"

"Lance..." JC tried again.

"I mean don't you get sick of it, Josh?"

"Of course..."

"Then how come you never act like it? You never get frustrated."

"I do, Lance. You think I wouldn't like to tell the world about us? Of course I would. But we've discussed this, and it just isn't an option now."

"When will it ever be?"

"It will."

"Bullshit."

"Lance!" JC was shocked. He could not believe that this serious discussion had arisen from a simple question. What was worse was Lance's attitude. He sounded so angry. He had very rarely heard Lance talk that way. Of course it had been all too often lately. "Lance, what's going on? Why are you so upset?"

"I don't know!" Lance shouted. He looked like he shocked even himself. "I don't know," he repeated, in a softer voice. His green eyes were filled with angry tears.

"Hey, baby," JC said, pulling Lance into his arms. "It's ok."

"No," Lance said into his shoulder. "It's not. I...I'm sorry, I don't know why..."

"It's gonna be ok, Lance."

"Yeah?" Lance pulled away slightly to see JC's face.

JC smiled, and stroked a finger along Lance's cheek, wiping a tear away. "Yeah," he said, leaning closer to brush his lips against Lance's. Lance sighed as JC deepened the kiss. He slipped his tongue into Lance's mouth, meeting Lance's, sliding against it restlessly. He felt Lance smile against his mouth, before he broke the kiss.

"Josh, as much as I'd like to continue this, I am really tired."

JC groaned. "All right baby. We'll continue this tomorrow."

"Yeah, we will," Lance agreed, settling down against JC's chest.

"I'm gonna hold you to that," JC muttered as he turned off the light.

***

JC woke up with a groan. Reaching beside him to find the clock, he turned it towards himself. 7:00 am. Not that early, but too early for him to be up, that was for sure. He turned back over towards Lance, and was surprised to see an empty space. Then he realized what had woke him up in the first place. A noise. He glanced towards the bathroom. The door was shut, with light coming through the cracks at the bottom and sides. There was the sound again. Sighing, JC slipped out of the bed, wincing at the coldness of the floor. He knocked on the bathroom door and called softly, "Lance?" The only response he got was a repeat of the noise he had heard twice earlier. It sounded like retching. He reached for the doorknob and was surprised to see his hand shaking. Taking a deep breath, he opened the door. Lance was on his knees in front of the toilet, clutching his stomach. His face was a pale shade of green. `Sort of like his eyes,' JC thought strangely, as he dropped to his knees next to Lance.

"You ok?"

"Do I look ok?" Lance's voice sounded hoarse.

"I thought we had this discussion yesterday," JC joked, halfheartedly. Lance gave him an evil glare. JC sighed again. He brought a hand to Lance's back and stroked it soothingly.

"Probably something I ate," Lance rasped.

"Yeah, probably," JC agreed. "You ready to go back to bed?"

Lance paused for a minute, as if assessing himself. Finally he said, "Yeah, I think I'm ok now." He allowed JC to help him off his knees and back to bed. When he was lying down and covered up, JC moved a hand to his forehead. Lance tried to slap it away.

"I don't have a fever," he muttered.

"No, you're right, you don't. Huh. You want a cup of tea, or something?"

Lance shook his head. "No, I just want to sleep for another..." he glanced at the clock, "...three hours."

"You sure you want to go to rehearsal?"

"Yes, JC."

"OK, OK, don't get angry. Jeez," JC said, slipping back into bed, and checking the alarm clock to make sure it was set. He glanced at Lance, who was practically asleep already. He slipped an arm around Lance's body and pulled him closer, resting his chin atop his lover's head. "I love you Lance," he murmured into the soft blonde hair. Reluctantly he closed his eyes. Somehow he knew that falling back to sleep would not be quite so easy for him.


	Inner Reflection \| home back to But Faith Part 3 ~Suddenly I see you change...~ "Lance?" He felt a hand shaking his shoulder. Groaning, he opened his eyes. There to meet him were a pair of bright blue eyes. "Hey Josh," he muttered, stifling a yawn. "What time is it?" "A little after six. You hungry?" "Yeah, I guess," Lance said, sitting up. "I guess we should order something, huh?" "What?" JC looked at him, puzzled. "Order. You know, food?" "Why?" "Cause it's getting late." "Yeah, but Lance, I cooked." "You did?" Lance sat up a bit more and sniffed the air. He didn't smell anything. "Josh? Are you kidding me?" "Why? What do ya mean?" "I don't smell anything." "Really?" Josh's puzzled expression turned to one of mild concern. "Don't give me that look," Lance said, standing up. "It's probably just my sinuses." "Yeah, I'm sure it is," JC said agreeably. "Come on, let's eat." * "So," JC said, rolling toward Lance, who was looking over some paperwork. "You excited?" "What about?" Lance asked, not looking up. "The tour." "Oh, yeah. Absolutely. Tour buses, hotels and airplanes, and getting to spend absolutely no time alone with you, except at night, when we'll be too tired to do much but sleep. Yeah, can't wait." "Come on Lance. It won't be that bad." "You think?" He finally looked up and placed his papers aside. "What, am the only one who remembers the last two tours?" "Lance..." "I mean, God forbid we look like we're just a little too close. And all the interviews. 'So, Lance are you seeing anyone?' 'Oh no, we don't have time for that. I want to be there for my girlfriend.' God, I'm so sick of it!" "Lance..." JC tried again. "I mean don't you get sick of it, Josh?" "Of course..." "Then how come you never act like it? You never get frustrated." "I do, Lance. You think I wouldn't like to tell the world about us? Of course I would. But we've discussed this, and it just isn't an option now." "When will it ever be?" "It will." "Bullshit." "Lance!" JC was shocked. He could not believe that this serious discussion had arisen from a simple question. What was worse was Lance's attitude. He sounded so angry. He had very rarely heard Lance talk that way. Of course it had been all too often lately. "Lance, what's going on? Why are you so upset?" "I don't know!" Lance shouted. He looked like he shocked even himself. "I don't know," he repeated, in a softer voice. His green eyes were filled with angry tears. "Hey, baby," JC said, pulling Lance into his arms. "It's ok." "No," Lance said into his shoulder. "It's not. I...I'm sorry, I don't know why..." "It's gonna be ok, Lance." "Yeah?" Lance pulled away slightly to see JC's face. JC smiled, and stroked a finger along Lance's cheek, wiping a tear away. "Yeah," he said, leaning closer to brush his lips against Lance's. Lance sighed as JC deepened the kiss. He slipped his tongue into Lance's mouth, meeting Lance's, sliding against it restlessly. He felt Lance smile against his mouth, before he broke the kiss. "Josh, as much as I'd like to continue this, I am really tired." JC groaned. "All right baby. We'll continue this tomorrow." "Yeah, we will," Lance agreed, settling down against JC's chest. "I'm gonna hold you to that," JC muttered as he turned off the light. * JC woke up with a groan. Reaching beside him to find the clock, he turned it towards himself. 7:00 am. Not that early, but too early for him to be up, that was for sure. He turned back over towards Lance, and was surprised to see an empty space. Then he realized what had woke him up in the first place. A noise. He glanced towards the bathroom. The door was shut, with light coming through the cracks at the bottom and sides. There was the sound again. Sighing, JC slipped out of the bed, wincing at the coldness of the floor. He knocked on the bathroom door and called softly, "Lance?" The only response he got was a repeat of the noise he had heard twice earlier. It sounded like retching. He reached for the doorknob and was surprised to see his hand shaking. Taking a deep breath, he opened the door. Lance was on his knees in front of the toilet, clutching his stomach. His face was a pale shade of green. `Sort of like his eyes,' JC thought strangely, as he dropped to his knees next to Lance. "You ok?" "Do I look ok?" Lance's voice sounded hoarse. "I thought we had this discussion yesterday," JC joked, halfheartedly. Lance gave him an evil glare. JC sighed again. He brought a hand to Lance's back and stroked it soothingly. "Probably something I ate," Lance rasped. "Yeah, probably," JC agreed. "You ready to go back to bed?" Lance paused for a minute, as if assessing himself. Finally he said, "Yeah, I think I'm ok now." He allowed JC to help him off his knees and back to bed. When he was lying down and covered up, JC moved a hand to his forehead. Lance tried to slap it away. "I don't have a fever," he muttered. "No, you're right, you don't. Huh. You want a cup of tea, or something?" Lance shook his head. "No, I just want to sleep for another..." he glanced at the clock, "...three hours." "You sure you want to go to rehearsal?" "Yes, JC." "OK, OK, don't get angry. Jeez," JC said, slipping back into bed, and checking the alarm clock to make sure it was set. He glanced at Lance, who was practically asleep already. He slipped an arm around Lance's body and pulled him closer, resting his chin atop his lover's head. "I love you Lance," he murmured into the soft blonde hair. Reluctantly he closed his eyes. Somehow he knew that falling back to sleep would not be quite so easy for him.