Chapter 10

"Actually, it was my mom," Justin chimed. "She was listening to us sing, and she said we sounded in synch. And it kinda stuck, and we were fooling around with the name, and we noticed that the last letter of our first name spells out 'Nsync, so it's perfect."

Lance took it cautiously. He noticed Joey looking at him oddly out of the corner of his eyes, but he shrugged it off. He shook Lou's hand, shuddering a little at the strange feeling that coursed through him. Only Joey noticed, but Lance played it off with a shrug.

Joey watched Lance as they listened to Lou drone on about how they'd start slow. Lance was glaring at something. What? Joey looked. It looked like he was glaring at Lou...no, it was behind Lou. But what was behind him?

"We'll start by doing basketball games, and such," Lou was saying. Joey shifted in his seat so he could get a better look. Lance was still glaring at whatever was behind Lou. He finally got a clear view when Lou moved a little bit. He saw what Lance was glaring at. It was...

Lance straightened up. He hadn't been expecting this question. "Wh...what?" He saw all of them looking at him now, curious as to what his answer would be.

"Why don't you ever talk to your parents?" Justin repeated softly. "I mean, you said that you didn't even know if they knew you were here."

"I think you should tell us, Lance," Chris said. Lance's head snapped over and he looked at Chris. "I mean, we're a band, right? We're gonna be together for a while...we've been together for a few months now. No secrets."

Lance almost smiled at the ironic statement, but he was feeling sick to his stomach from dread. Emotions were raging through him, emotions he hadn't felt in over a hundred years. Fear, worry, caution. He didn't want to tell them this. He didn't know how they'd take it, and in an instant, he was transported back in time.

"Sarah just told us something, James," his father Jim said. Lance's head snapped up. He hoped to the Lord that this wasn't what he thought. "What did you mean when you told her you liked guys?" he asked coldly. It was. Sarah had betrayed him.

Lance shook his head, releasing his mind of the memory. What happened next had been horrible. His father had proceeded to tell him that he was sick and an abomination to mankind. Then he'd told him that Lance was dead in his eyes and he never wanted to see him again.

He didn't want to have the same thing happen with his four friends. For they were more than just his charges now, they had all become best of friends. Chris was still a little cold towards him, but he knew that would come to an end eventually, even though he didn't know why. He thought it might have something to do with the fact that he didn't associate with his family. Chris was a big family person, though you wouldn't always know it by looking at him.

"Well...um...I didn't..." he sat down heavily on the couch and rubbed his temples. "I told you that first day that they don't care much about me and I don't care much about them?"

Lance laughed bitterly. "No they don't. You don't know them. Neither did I. When I was fourteen...they found out..." he stopped, and his voice was choked and his eyes were bright with tears. "When I was fourteen," he began again, "They disowned me. My father called me sick and an abomination to mankind. They told me I was dead to them, and that they didn't have a son. They said they'd put me in jail if I ever associated with them or my sister again." He shuddered. "That was the worst day of my life..." he paused, remembering his death. "One of the worst days," he said. They couldn't know he died.

"You were fourteen?" Joey asked in disbelief. Lance nodded. He looked at the ground, waiting for the question he knew would come.

"Before I tell you...I don't know how you're going to take this...so if you want me to leave the group..." he took a deep, painful breath. "I will."

"We won't---" Justin began, but Lance cut him off. He looked around at each of the other four, and his green eyes were still bright with unshed tears. Memories were hitting him full force and he couldn't escape them.

"You don't know that, Justin," he said quietly. He locked his eyes on the floor. "Maybe you'll think I should've told you this when we first started, but...I...Crap," he sighed. "This is so hard. I...I'm gay, you guys. I'm gay."

Lance tore his eyes away from the floor. He looked at the guys. Joey's jaw had dropped to the floor. Justin was looking at him like he was trying to figure something out, his head tilted. JC was staring at him with a peculiar expression on his face, but his eyes were full of surprise. And Chris... Chris was completely different. Chris had a little bit of anger smoldering in his eyes.

Lance took the silence as disapproval and stood up. "All right then," he breathed out. He started walking towards the door. A voice stopped him.

"You're a fag? You could've told us BEFORE we let you in the group. I can't believe you're a queer. I knew there was something wrong with you."

Lance turned around and faced the speaker. Chris. "Sorry you feel that way," he whispered, a tear trickling down his face. He looked at the other three. "Thanks for the opportunity to sing for a little bit with you guys. It was fun." He looked at them one more time.


	Inner Reflection \| home back to Sent From Above Chapter 10 " "Lou, this is Lance Bass, the fifth member of 'Nsync," Chris said. "So you've come up with a name," Lou said with a grin. "How'd you think of that one?" "Actually, it was my mom," Justin chimed. "She was listening to us sing, and she said we sounded in synch. And it kinda stuck, and we were fooling around with the name, and we noticed that the last letter of our first name spells out 'Nsync, so it's perfect." "But Lance is E, right? So who's the second N?" "Well...he became Lansten for the day," Justin grinned. Lou let out a hearty laugh. "Great. Anyway, it's great to finally meet you, Lance," he said, sticking out a pudgy hand. Lance took it cautiously. He noticed Joey looking at him oddly out of the corner of his eyes, but he shrugged it off. He shook Lou's hand, shuddering a little at the strange feeling that coursed through him. Only Joey noticed, but Lance played it off with a shrug. Joey watched Lance as they listened to Lou drone on about how they'd start slow. Lance was glaring at something. What? Joey looked. It looked like he was glaring at Lou...no, it was behind Lou. But what was behind him? "We'll start by doing basketball games, and such," Lou was saying. Joey shifted in his seat so he could get a better look. Lance was still glaring at whatever was behind Lou. He finally got a clear view when Lou moved a little bit. He saw what Lance was glaring at. It was... The wall? **** ~1996~** "So, Lance," Justin asked. "What's with your parents?" They were all at Justin's house, in his basement rehearsing. Lance straightened up. He hadn't been expecting this question. "Wh...what?" He saw all of them looking at him now, curious as to what his answer would be. "Why don't you ever talk to your parents?" Justin repeated softly. "I mean, you said that you didn't even know if they knew you were here." Lance blinked. "I...uh..." JC came to his defense. "You don't have to if you don't want to, Lance, but it's just that we're all curious..." "I think you should tell us, Lance," Chris said. Lance's head snapped over and he looked at Chris. "I mean, we're a band, right? We're gonna be together for a while...we've been together for a few months now. No secrets." Lance almost smiled at the ironic statement, but he was feeling sick to his stomach from dread. Emotions were raging through him, emotions he hadn't felt in over a hundred years. Fear, worry, caution. He didn't want to tell them this. He didn't know how they'd take it, and in an instant, he was transported back in time. ~Flashback~ "Sarah just told us something, James," his father Jim said. Lance's head snapped up. He hoped to the Lord that this wasn't what he thought. "What did you mean when you told her you liked guys?" he asked coldly. It was. Sarah had betrayed him. ~End Flashback~ Lance shook his head, releasing his mind of the memory. What happened next had been horrible. His father had proceeded to tell him that he was sick and an abomination to mankind. Then he'd told him that Lance was dead in his eyes and he never wanted to see him again. He didn't want to have the same thing happen with his four friends. For they were more than just his charges now, they had all become best of friends. Chris was still a little cold towards him, but he knew that would come to an end eventually, even though he didn't know why. He thought it might have something to do with the fact that he didn't associate with his family. Chris was a big family person, though you wouldn't always know it by looking at him. "You still with us?" Joey asked gently. "What?" he shook his head, clearing his mind. "Yeah, sorry, I kind of zoned..." "So?" Chris prodded. "Well...um...I didn't..." he sat down heavily on the couch and rubbed his temples. "I told you that first day that they don't care much about me and I don't care much about them?" "Yeah," JC said, also sitting down. "Well, the truth is..." he paused and sighed. "The truth is they don't care about me. At all." "You can't say that," Joey said. "They're your parents, of course they care about you." Lance laughed bitterly. "No they don't. You don't know them. Neither did I. When I was fourteen...they found out..." he stopped, and his voice was choked and his eyes were bright with tears. "When I was fourteen," he began again, "They disowned me. My father called me sick and an abomination to mankind. They told me I was dead to them, and that they didn't have a son. They said they'd put me in jail if I ever associated with them or my sister again." He shuddered. "That was the worst day of my life..." he paused, remembering his death. "One of the worst days," he said. They couldn't know he died. "That's awful," JC whispered. Lance looked at the group. "You were fourteen?" Joey asked in disbelief. Lance nodded. He looked at the ground, waiting for the question he knew would come. Chris asked it. "Why?" "Before I tell you...I don't know how you're going to take this...so if you want me to leave the group..." he took a deep, painful breath. "I will." "We won't---" Justin began, but Lance cut him off. He looked around at each of the other four, and his green eyes were still bright with unshed tears. Memories were hitting him full force and he couldn't escape them. "You don't know that, Justin," he said quietly. He locked his eyes on the floor. "Maybe you'll think I should've told you this when we first started, but...I...Crap," he sighed. "This is so hard. I...I'm gay, you guys. I'm gay." Silence. Lance tore his eyes away from the floor. He looked at the guys. Joey's jaw had dropped to the floor. Justin was looking at him like he was trying to figure something out, his head tilted. JC was staring at him with a peculiar expression on his face, but his eyes were full of surprise. And Chris... Chris was completely different. Chris had a little bit of anger smoldering in his eyes. Lance took the silence as disapproval and stood up. "All right then," he breathed out. He started walking towards the door. A voice stopped him. "You're a fag? You could've told us BEFORE we let you in the group. I can't believe you're a queer. I knew there was something wrong with you." Lance turned around and faced the speaker. Chris. "Sorry you feel that way," he whispered, a tear trickling down his face. He looked at the other three. "Thanks for the opportunity to sing for a little bit with you guys. It was fun." He looked at them one more time. "You're no better than they were," he whispered bitterly. "No better than they were."